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True Life Roomies Stories
My real Mum and Dad
Nicola Landles may not have been brought up by her blood parents, but having been there through thick and thin, shes in no doubt she has the very best parents a girl could ask for.
I was too young to remember my mother. All I really know is that she became ill, choked in her sleep one night and then she was gone. There were six of us kids. Robert, then 7, Vanessa 6, Carlson 5, Natalie 4, Sean 3 and me at 18 months.
My real father didnt want any of us. As far as I know he just walked out, so the responsibility fell on the rest of our family to take us in. Some of my brothers and sisters had to spend time in care. I was one of the luckier ones.
It was my mothers brother Terry and his wife Carol who took me. Theyd been married less than a year when my mum died, but as my godparents they took the role seriously. It was quite a shock for them, having never had children and having only lived together a short time. But they were the best parents anyone could ask for.
Of course, when I hit my teenage years I didnt think that way. I did all the usual rebellious stuff. But when I look back now and think about all the things Ive done and achieved since, I know I could never have done it without them. I was four when my sister Kelly was born and six when my brother Craig came along, but not once did I ever feel like I wasnt as important as they were, or as loved.
When I was 18, I went to meet my real Dad. Thats when I really realised what my adopted parents had given me, things I would never have had growing up with my real family. They taught me to have standards and morals, the difference between right and wrong. They gave me the skills to get through life. What I didnt know at 18 was just how much support they would give me in adulthood.
I had a horrible marriage. When I met my husband, my first son Luke was six months old. Within six months I was pregnant with my daughter Teri, now 11. At the time I thought it was the right thing to do to marry him, but I had no idea what I was getting into. Within six weeks of Teris birth I was pregnant again with Keiran, now 10. After that things just went from bad to worse. My husband was already controlling, but then came the violence. Youd think I would have left immediately, but he threatened to ruin our lives if I left, scared me into staying.
After a while, he wouldnt let me go out. He dictated what I wore, even down to the length of my shirt sleeves. I lost all my friends and just hid from the world. Mum and Dad still only lived 15 miles away, but I barely saw them. No one knew. Its not something you talk about when youre in it and its amazing how well you can hide things. It took me seven years to build up the courage to leave, but then one day my Dad came to my house to visit and I suddenly snapped. I want out, I confessed. I need to leave. And through my sobs the truth came spilling out. My parents were horrified.
Within two days my Dad had found me a house and had it furnished from top to bottom so my kids and I could move. Hed drive round every day when hed finished work to check on us. Every time I heard a noise and was scared it was my ex, Dad would be there in minutes. And then there was Mum, my rock, always there when I needed to talk. They couldnt have been more amazing.
But my nightmare wasnt over. My ex-husbands threats to ruin our lives continued and on the 18th March 2004 he filed for custody of the children, and told the court a string of lies to make me out to be an unfit mother. My parents did everything they could to help me fight back. They even filed for custody of my children themselves. But the judge believed my ex-husband and my children were taken away.
Ill never know the full extent of what he put my kids through during their 18 months with him, and what I do know is too painful to talk about. It was like a year and a half of hell, before we were finally back in front of the judge with enough evidence to prove the truth. The judge herself was almost in tears when she realised what hed put my children through. But he was such a convincing liar, I couldnt blame her. At least he has been sent to prison now for what hes done.
I was allowed to see the children every other weekend while they were with ex and I never missed a visit, but nothing prepared me for how I felt when I finally got them back. It was wonderful. Hard work, of course, like being a new parent all over again, but it was the best day of my life. Theyll have been back two years on August 10th. Sure, they drive me mad sometimes, but Ive never been happier.
I have a wonderful new partner, Kieron. Big Keiron we all call him, because he has the same name as my son. My parents couldnt be happier that Ive found a nice man. Theyre over the moon for me. But theyre still the ones I rely on, the first people I call. Without them and my brother and sister, I dont know how I would have managed. Theyre the most brilliant people I know.
